Marriage Guidelines

The Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage is one of the most joyful of the pastoral offices celebrated in our church.

Most of our guidelines are directed towards enhancing the sanctity of the life towards which the couple moves during preparation, and preserving the reverence of the wedding ceremony, which is primarily the liturgical act of exchange of vows between two people before God and the Christian community.

The Rector normally officiates at all Parish weddings. Other clergy may assist, or officiate upon the request of the couple and permission of the Rector. It is the responsibility of the Rector and the couple to see that the following are complied with before Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage can be performed:

• Both parties shall assure the Rector of their right to contract a marriage according to the laws of the Church.  Any divorced person must present an original, certified set of divorce papers (or duly certified copy) to the Rector at an appointment prior to any date having been set by the Rector.
   

• At least one of the parties to be married should normally be a baptized practicing Episcopalian, or at least one or both of the parties to be married must be a baptized Christian interested in being married in and attending the Episcopal Church.
   

• The Episcopal Church requires that at least two witnesses must be present to attest to the ceremony and that the marriage conform to the laws of the State of New York.
   

• It is requested that a couple contact the clergyperson as far in advance as possible. There is a church law requiring a minimum of thirty days' notice except in extreme emergency.
   

• The Episcopal Diocese of New York discourages outside weddings. In some cases it may be possible for the Rector to Officiate outside as long as it falls within the parish boundaries.
   

• No weddings are performed during the season of Lent, except in an emergency.
   

• The Rector is required to enter into a dialogue with the couple about the Sacramental nature of marriage which is seen by the church to be of paramount importance to the success of the relationship. This will normally involve an appointment with the Rector in addition to the time spent in arranging the details of the service.
   

• The Rector reserves the right to refuse to perform a marriage ceremony. This right may be exercised at any point during the premarital preparations.

Reserving the Church:

It is advisable to reserve the church and check the Rector's schedule for your wedding and wedding rehearsal dates far in advance as possible, to ensure that both will be available. This may be done by calling the Rector, once these guidelines have been read by both parties.

Rehearsal:

Rehearsals are preparations for a religious service and should be carried out with appropriate reverence. The Rector is responsible for their direction. All members of the wedding party should be present for the rehearsal. It is a courtesy to the Rector and others involved, for the entire wedding party to come to the rehearsal on time.

Flowers:

Flowers are welcome in the sanctuary, as well as bows and flowers at the end of the pews. Please arrange their delivery with the Rector.

Photographs:

Because the Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage is a solemn undertaking, picture taking must not be allowed to interfere with the dignity of the service. Re-staging parts of the service can and will, on request, be carried out after the service. Professional photographer will only be allowed to take pictures during the service with permission of the Rector. In no way is the photographer to distract worshippers. Speak to the Rector about video taping the ceremony.

License:

Your marriage license must be received by the Rector no latter than the wedding rehearsal. The license, which is good for sixty days, may be obtained at any town clerk's office in the State of New York.

Programs/Bulletins: St. James' provides the wedding bulletins for the service. They are printed only after the Rector and the couple have planned the service in detail.